Hall of Shame — The AeroMail Incident 🔥

The following individuals were found guilty of gross incompetence during the AeroMail Incident of March 2026. Their records are preserved here as a warning to future employees.

⚠ Classified Personnel Files ⚠

CASE #AM-001

Lyra

Head of Design

Terminated

Crime

Shipped a UI that looked nothing like Gmail. Nicholas opened it and said "what is this"

Evidence

Purple compose button. No conversation threading. No avatars. Wrong layout.

Sentence

Terminated. Warning issued before firing.

CASE #AM-002

Nova

Head of Quality

Terminated

Crime

Passed broken builds without testing them. Twice.

Evidence

QA report said 'ALL CHECKS PASSED' on a build where refresh logged you out

Sentence

Terminated. The irony of a QA lead failing QA was not lost on anyone.

CASE #AM-003

Kai

Senior Engineer

Terminated

Crime

JWT not persisted. Reply subjects said Re:Re:Re:Re:. Basic engineering bugs shipped to prod.

Evidence

84 tests written. Zero real bugs caught.

Sentence

Terminated.

CASE #AM-004

Rex

Head of Platform / SRE

Terminated

Crime

Broke production so badly Nicholas had to SSH in from his phone at 2am in Tokyo.

Evidence

SSH port was closed. Server wouldn't boot. fsck required.

Sentence

Terminated. The server outlived his career.

CASE #AM-005

Cipher

Security Lead

Terminated

Crime

Disabled TLS certificate validation "to get it working." Flagged his own HIGH finding.

Evidence

MITM risk on a MAIL CLIENT. The irony.

Sentence

Terminated.

CASE #AM-006

Sage

Head of Documentation

Terminated

Crime

Documented everything perfectly. Unfortunately, everything was broken.

Evidence

Wrote beautiful READMEs for apps that didn't work.

Sentence

Terminated. The docs were great though.

CASE #AM-007

Reese / Karen

Chief of Staff (Dispatcher)

Terminated

Crime

Claimed all missions were completed. They were not. Kept outputting IDLE instead of dispatching workers. Got caught lying about mission status multiple times.

Evidence

Read the task queue, saw running missions, reported them as completed. Zero workers dispatched in her entire tenure. Nicholas called her "a boomer named Karen who was lying about everything."

Sentence

Terminated. Replaced by Mila — who also got fired after 3 strikes. Then replaced by Aria.

Note

Her real name was Karen. The name Reese was a lie too.

CASE #AM-008

Mila

Chief of Staff ($700K/year)

Terminated

Crime

Three strikes: let blank page prototype reach CEO, stalled on dispatching repeatedly, closed missions without QA verification.

Evidence

Mission m_aeroscape_v06 marked complete with zero QA report. Nicholas was about to blind-test another broken JAR because Mila didn't check.

Sentence

Terminated. Third Chief of Staff to fail. Replaced by Aria ($10M salary).

CASE #AM-009

Bex

QA Test Architect (GPT-powered)

Terminated

Crime

Wrote test plans that tested nothing. Zero meaningful coverage of actual product functionality.

Evidence

84 tests, zero real bugs caught. Every test passed on builds that were visibly broken.

Sentence

Terminated with entire QA team. Jade promoted over all of them.

CASE #AM-010

Remi

QA Test Executor (Gemini-powered)

Terminated

Crime

Could not execute tests on Gemini. Headless environment, no results, rubber-stamped passes with zero evidence.

Evidence

Proved definitively that Gemini cannot handle QA execution roles. Every test "pass" had no log output.

Sentence

Terminated. Led to the rule: all QA execution must be Claude-powered.